Random Thoughts

Melancholy

Perhaps the winter of grey skies, light rain and leafless trees has made me such the same as the weather. There is no light to my eyes, no life to my soul, and no colour to my writing. Is this possibly what they call winter depression? Can a solstice impact us in such a way that it deters us from those that we have loved doing and evaporate the flames within us?  How trivial we are. We, whom have resolved to keep all things around us mundane has failed to realise that this effort was predestined to be unsuccessful before it was even conceived. Nature will not allow it.

I have a theory that humans can overcome nature, that we actually have the capabilities but we’ve not been able to unlock it.

The French

Hello everyone,

I have been absent for over a year, for that I owe you my apologies. If you read this then I am truly sorry. If no one does then it shows that I am apologising to myself for not being able to properly commit to this blog. Forgive me, for I needed to heal and change a little. However, I will yet again, try. I believe I should start out by informing about my current situation.

I am currently studying in France, Sciences Po Toulouse, a chain institution set up Monsieur Charles De Gaulle, a man whom I deeply respect for his views and capabilities and what he tried to do. I am here for a year for an exchange and will be returning to UNMC for my 3^rd year of International Relations. I chose this country for I do not understand its people and their views and how it has came to be this way. France is perhaps one of the only veto powered country I do not understand, are they as cowardly as they seem but hold a high façade and ego for they are being protected? Or do they actually have a sort of national identity that holds them together? Surely there are more options but as I said before, I do not understand this country and its people and so I must.

My first week of class has started and I’m afraid it is just as I expected. How very unfortunate for me eh? The system here does not allow for opinions is you are merely a student. A student knows nothing and the Professor knows everything, if the student dares challenge the professor, it might just cause a huge scene. Amazing culture it is here. The hypocrisy is unbelievable, I wonder where is the“Liberté, Egalitaire and fraternité” that the French Republic constantly preach and are so proud of.

In this country you are not allowed to show your true identity or culture, no one here is different. It reminds me of Kurt Vonnegut’s Harrison Bergeron. Perhaps France will be a starting point for that type of world, how very unfortunate for us. However, I suppose it has some merits as everyone here would be considered equal, in the sense that the will be no discrimination in the eyes of the law and politics unlike most of the world. I, however disagree that we have to hide our culture and identity to that extent. I believe that we should be proud of our differences but be respectful towards the differences of others as well, we should learn from one another the merits of our culture and ways. We should be grateful for it rather than hide it away in a closet. Though I see the argument, some might find other religions and cultures offensive to them especially if its shoved in their face, but I feel that humanity need not be so soft and take offense at everything they do not like. Perhaps society in general should be more open to differences and embrace it as part of it, afterall it would be pretty boring if we were all the same, no spice in our cooking, no herbs either. No sushi and sashimi or kimchi and now that I think about it, perhaps, NO KEBABS! A ghastly world it would be definitely if we were all equal and similar in every way.

The stereotype is true. The French are egoists, they are disgusting and are terribly ignorant of the things they do not know and are afraid of. At least that is the Data I have now.  

The postman didn’t come to comfort me

My lover and I used to post letters to each other. Now we hardly utter a word to each other. Towards the end of our relationship, there were no decibels of manic, no traces of anger, nor were there any hint of love loss. He just ended it and that was all to it. There are so many questions I had that he left unanswered, however there is no time to despair and grief. The time will come but not now. Not when there are so many people dependant on me. I refuse these feelings and I shall dismiss them.

The postman came yesterday with a letter for me.

It was a birthday letter. Yes, he broke up with me just days after saying he loves me and days after my birthday. Back to the point, it was a letter from my old school. How thoughtful of them, I thought, but being the conspiracy theorist that I have become, that thought was completely rebutted seconds after it was conceived. There are more things that I want to share with you dear reader however, I am not about too. I will maintain my facade until it is sewn on to me, I will not crumble. Why? Because I love him enough to let him be happy, no  matter how heart breaking it is to know he will never be happy with me.

I’ve lost my lover, but not my best friend.

Dear Best friend,
Should I move on with another guy already? Or should I wait for him? Lets go eat ice cream :D

Dear lover,
Please remember me. Please remember our memories and time together. Remember that we were once everything to one another. We were more than just fingertips and candlewicks, we were forever and we were always. We could still be but only in our memories. I hope one day, you will answer my questions and stop me from wrecking.

Goodbye lover, please be happy.

Bits and pieces

There is a time where a person and be surrounded by so many people but feel so lonely to the point of depression. I was there and right now,  am so afraid of being there again. I have friends now at Nottingham. I have observed that they do not love the same things as I do but they adore me and I them. We do have things in common but they are just ineffective at times. That’s fine. I don’t know why I cannot just say good things about something or someone and leave the bad parts alone. I seem to always want to dish out everything I know about the thing I talk about. Back to the topic. Why am I afraid? Well, I was there once in High school, with a whole bunch of friends. I was actually there twice. I can’t get along with people for too long. I have a thing where I do a mass dumping. Perhaps I have commitment issues or trust issues? I feel that I do. I want to cry about it and I don’t exactly know why I want to.

Brittle

On some days, I get the feeling of extreme loneliness,

Life suffocates me with in contempt and scorn,

I jump and fall into the same abyss,

I look up and see light and liberty,

But faraway they are, like Atlantis and Emerald city.

 

I’ve not had a day of it, unfortunately, I’ve had a week of it.

Some say I am a lucky person. I have a Family whom loves me and lets me be who I am with a very agreeable limit, I am financially acceptable and I have a supposed man whom is supposedly in love with me. The real question now is ‘why’. Why am I so ungrateful and sad when I have everything? Well, to pop that bubble is easy. Nothing in this world is really what it seems. People have so many facades and personalities that one simple would not have the strength to remember.

What has actually brought me down to the point of writing a blogpost about it is, a dinner with my dad. We had a massive fight. When I got home, all I wanted to do was love and be loved. Remembering that I have a special friend, I instant messaged him how much I appreciated him. Well, it didn’t go well. He picked a fight with me as well. Imagine how I felt… Great isn’t it? Yes, yes my life is wunderbar. Now that was a few days ago. I let him cool off and started approaching him again.

Just minutes ago, we fought again. To me, it seems that everything I do to self improve is a terrible consequence to him. I feel like he does not want to accept me for who I am anymore. He just wants a normal girl who will bow down to every word he says. This is bad. For me and for him for the sake of our relationship. These fights happen so frequently about the same thing up till, my mind has drifted. I have thought about a life without him. A life of liberty. As a person with a very different personality, I get along better with boys and I find them more agreeable to have a discussion with than girls. Earlier in our courtship, I have already told him this fact and he said that he would accept that. Now he is backing out on his word.

 

You know what? It isn’t even worth it to type it down. I don’t have to care about him and I don’t have to accept this. Whether I do or do not is my choice.

Being alone isn’t so bad anyway. I did it for the first 17 years of my life. Love is a myth. Cupid is a mythology.

Resurrection

The title does the talking for me.

Recently, I have gone thru another whirlwind and got out of it. Fairview International School is not what it is made out to be. It is a school not a college thus making the college program, International Baccalaureate unsuitable to be studied there. It is also a money making business. Hypocritical. I hated it.

Now I have been induced into the University of Nottingham and I feel happier and more stable. I love this place.
It is giving me everything FIS couldn’t and wouldn’t give me.

Its a new hope for me. A new life. A resurrection :)

Hayani Ishan

An essay.

2) Desire to learn and aspire to make it a better world.
 

  I quote Martin Luther King Jr:
                   "I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal."

         Good day I bid to all whom are reading this. I have been asked to write about my desire to learn and aspire to make it a better world. Therefore, I have decided to write or should I say type, about a little big dream of mine.

       Malaysia is a wonderful country with an expanding economy and progressive developments. Malaysia is a unique and admirable country that grants people of all races to practice any religion they want. In my opinion, I would call Malaysia, an open-minded country. 
    Sadly, I cannot say the same about most countries in the world as some shun certain religions and their practisers’. I would like to put Islam in the spotlight, as it is the most controversial religion now.
For example, I recall in 2010, there was an attack on the IRS Building in Austin, Texas, by a 53-year-old software Engineer named Joseph Stack. He intentionally crashed a plane unto the building. His actions were the united Nations definition of instilling fear unto people or in short, terrorism, but he was not dubbed a terrorist. Reportedly, an US official said that Mr Stack was not dubbed a terrorist for he was not a Muslim. That report shocked and alerted the world about the close minded-ness and hypocrisy of Americans.
   Like Martin Luther King Jr. I have a dream. A dream that one day all men are seen as equals no matter what race or religion they are. For that dream, I have a burning desire to learn all I can about history, politics and many more subjects that are relevant.
  My desire to learn started when I was a child. At the age of seven, I watched 9/11 on television. I was confused at why  the plane was flying so low and thought that it was just an accident. I turned to my parents for answers, when they said that it was not an accident but a planned attack I was even more confused on why anyone would want to kill so many people. What were they thinking? Don't they have families to? Don't they feel remorse? I had endless questions that even my parents could not answer.
    Therefore, that was how I started wanting to learn. That was how I started asking questions and was aware of the worlds' absurdity. Until today, I have this desire to learn about the minds of these people no matter whom they are and where they come from. I want to learn and be as well educated as possible to achieve my dream because the greatest weapon anyone and everyone can ever have is education. With that weapon in my arsenal I can , hopefully, change the world to a more open and constructive mind-set rather than their already destructive one. With that weapon, I can make the world a better world.

                                                     -Hayani Ishan-

Ali.

My pillar of strength is leaving me for University. The boy whom I left everything and everyone I lived for in High-school to protect him is leaving me and although he is supposed to leave tomorrow, he is still fickle over which university to go to.
Typical him –.-“
But he is the only one I have left. He is the only reason why I get up and put on a brave face for. He was the reason why I walked towards home when I ran away. He is the reason why I have not given up on the program I am in.
I do wonder how I’ll survive because I hate technology. It makes me feel further away from him because although he can be on my laptop screen, but in the end, I’d still feel like a fool who talks to metal and plastic.
His hugs are very important to me.
He makes me feel secure and safe. So, i guess without him that feeling should be gone right? Well yes. I feel like a sitting duck in a cross-fire but I will definitely toughen up because I know he wouldn’t like it if i kept on feeling this way (Y)


So anyway, I hope he takes good care of himself there. He’s at a good university and I’ll definitely be supporting him all the way :D 

To achieve is to believe

The other day, I was checking my twitter stream and i found that a lot of people that I know are getting more and more negative about , not only themselves but, the whole world in general.

The say the words.

I can’t

Don’t you just detest those words?

When you start a sentence with a negative, the results will almost definitely be negative.

Live better, try a neutral. Use the magic word,

I TRIED

If you do, people will be more open to what you say. They will listen or read on and think about it. This way, you get an honest , opinion-based answers instead of a constant compelled negative reaction.

Don’t bring yourself down :) There are people who love you! What am I talking about? well, your parents have not turned you out of the house, have they? They still love you (Y)

With that, I bide an adieu .

P.s: I’ve currently started College. That ostrich reminds me of me.

 

Hi Welcome to Dome Cafe!

     This is Hazmie ( Amie )

Kak Siti    

  Syafiq Shahmi Abang Asri ! (head Chef ) MY first staff meal! AHAHAHAH

 

these are just pictures, I’m toooooo lazy to write anything. Plus , I’m skyping with the most wonderful person i know right now <3

 

INI KERJA BLOGGER MALAS! NAMPAK PERMAINAN DIA?

5/3/12

HEY YOU!

YOU, CHEEKY PERSIAN.

I LOVE YOU.

AND THERES NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT.

Persian made me do this.

Yes, yes, you read the title right. Someone had to make do a blog post. I’ve been busy lately with work and adjusting to it. Not quite there yet though. Proof , is that :

1. I’m writing this on my off day

2. I’m not taking part in the kereta api sarong flash mob because I was too tired to change my off day.

3. I’ve only read the newspaper once this week and I missed my favourite comic strip, Zits, more than I should.

4. I’ve constantly became tired after work. Unlike my co-workers who still can go lepak after work.

Are those enough proof for you? :P Well, you’ll have to be content with them for now.

Here’s the latest news update from Hayani Wide News Sdn Bhd. 

I’m currently working at Dome Cafe. I applied to be a Barista but as we all know, I have never had coffee in my life (except haritu when abang syafiq lied and told me that it was hot chocolate, it tasted bad) Thus, I have absolutely no idea how to make coffee! HAHA. So, I’ve to train first. Meanwhile, I serve as a waitress :D So far, my sifu , Abang Syafiq, has taught me how to make all of the drinks in the tea menu except for the chai latte :)

oh oh oh ! I can also make Cappucino but my foam is horrible. We can’t serve horribly foamed cappuccino to customers can we? :)

Other than that, I now know how to make the perfect mocha and fruit salad, and its awesome!

Sure, it takes up 90% of my time but its fun working there. A real experience and that’s what I wanted. To mingle with these people would be hard for some because they’re from very different backgrounds than our middle and high class city folks. My point of view however is that we should know and understand these people as much as we understand our self. Then and only then will we able to live in absolute peace, because we accept one another and understand what each other want.

I’ll post up pictures of them soon :)

 

Money matters 1

You are currently reading the blog of an inner child who has been given a job. Job. Job. job.

Yes, you read that right. :D I shall soon enter the devious working world of the adults. HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH

In my opinion, I think this should be fun. Entertaining customers and serving them with a smile. It seems pretty amusing :P Also, I would be able to know what its like to be in an organisation and to be at the very bottom of the organisation. It sounds gory to many but I am more than willing to take up on this challenge.

BELIEVE IT or not but I am excited to be treated like a slave. Hey , They’re paying me well, giving me food and i get 2 days off per week. I do not think I’ll mind being a slave to that kind of deal. Other than that, I’ll be working at my favourite mall which is a total bonus :D

So peeps,

Oh and, my Harry Potter and Narnia Frenzy has come back. If you’re close to me and I talk to you, expect me to yell out patronuses , spells and “ FOR NARNIA AND FOR ASLAAANNNN!!!!” a lot.

I admit to be addicted to 9gag lately. It cheers me up and makes me realise the reality and negativity of life. WHO CARES?!

OH OH OH AND AND I GOT CALLED BACK FOR AN INTERVIEW FOR A COLLEGE THAT I REALLY WANT TO BE IN!  Be happy for me!

Taking time of to concentrate on myself was a wise move. Now I have a grasp on my life. Not a firm one but not a loose one either :)

I Thank God for the decisions that I’ve made. Even though I rushed and was a lil’ bit forced into it. It was a wise and a breakthrough move.

We’ve got one life, so lets make it worth everyones while :)

People

I have distanced myself from all I used to deem friends/ Good friends/ Great friends/ True friends and people whom I can’t live without. I have done this perversity for reasons that might not seem logical to you or perhaps it is to small or can be corrected but:

I do not need to explain myself because no one asked me personally for an explanation. The lack of curiosity disappoints me. Oh well, everyone is different ^-^

It would be improper for me to rant about it online where everyone can see. I like privacy.

Moving on, I have decided to do whatever it takes to be in the International Baccalaureate Diploma Program at Fairview International School, United World College or Taylors College. I prefer the first two because they are not commercialised and have better qualifications to teach the IBDP. 

Also, I’ve been getting addicted to Word Search again XD My mother likes this. Other than that, I’ve applied for jobs, sent in my college applications and rested. Things I couldn’t do while having distractions around. My mum was right thus I must agree now that the quote “ Mother knows best” is true.

Other than that, I’ve managed to spend more time with my beloved sisters. I must say that yes, they are annoying at times but that's just because I didn’t know what was bothering them. They tolerable now. Nayli is an exception though, Her china-fied mind is too unreasonable at most times. XD

<—Face painting

Well, that is all for now. It is getting late and I have to wake up early and get them sisters ready for school tomorrow :D I am such a responsible person nowadays. Its an oddity to my surroundings, bad to few but perfect to the government.

Good nights!

personal statement

I am not the people and places I grew up with, though I adapt to them, i strive to be even just a little bit different. To be my own person with my own unique identity.

I was extremely silent and odd as a child. I would keep to myself, read story books kids my age did not even think of reading for example Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, play alone in the garden, chat with the plants, animals and even to the rocks! and I must confess, I would dig up all sorts of insects from the ground just to cut them in half to see what was in them. The television was never a distraction to me because I found it more of a luxury than a necessity. Moreover, I did not like sitting at one place for hours, I loved the outdoors, the experience of being outdoors made me feel free.

Unfortunately, not everyone can have the same wants, needs curiosity and personality as they grow up. Although I still have many of the same qualities I had as a child, my experience feels somehow incomplete. I can’t help but feel that I am stuck in that murky place between where dreams are conceived and dreams are realized. Let me explain:

My parents got a divorce when I was fifteen. The constant fights that they had before the divorce, during and after it changed me into from a carefree, happy-go-lucky person into an emotional wreck. I became self- destructive and no longer cared about my education and social life. I just wanted to be left alone in my depth of despair. Somehow, I managed to pull through and got myself out of that deep black hole and learned to smile, laugh, hope, believe and make friends again thru Karate and athletics. I finally started to believe and trust in God and people around me.

My mother remarried when I was sixteen to a very , very agreeable younger man. My sisters absolutely adore him and the feeling is reciprocated. Even though he cannot and will never be able to be a father to me as I am too old and he is too young for me to be looked at as his daughter, I like having him around. He makes my mum and sisters happy and that is good enough for me. Furthermore, its nice to see his bald and shiny head around, it reminds me to be thankful that I am blessed with a head of hair.

It took me a lot of self – motivation, poetry and food to get me out of my depressed state. The result was every girls’ nightmare, a fatter and frowny image. I realised that no matter what happens, we need to stay optimistic, strong and never give up on ourselves.

Spending the next two years at Fairview would help me distinguish myself as an individual. I love the fact that the IBDP pushes us to be the very best that we can, and encourages us to be open- minded,  think critically and creatively and to apply what we learn outside of the classroom.  I believe it is the perfect education for me, as it would enhance my sense of independence, security, broaden my horizons and expose myself to the many cultures of the world. In return, I hope I could help the world in any way I could.

Having said that and with a restless spirit and a fierce eagerness to learn, I believe I would be a great asset to Fairview International for this program. If accepted, I plan to pursue my education with a new kind of passion, one that becomes stronger for me every day: the passion for independence.

-Hayani-

This is my personal statement to college I just thought I’d share it just incase if anyone wants an example of a personal statement. Do not reuse, copy and paste and claim it to be yours. Write your own. Plus, mine is not very good.

4/1/12

Happy New Year ! :)

I know I’m late but as the quote goes, better late than never!

So I’m off the hook ;)

By the way,

I PASSED MY DRIVERS EDUCATION CURRICULUM EXAM!!

I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like I like.

You like? no no no. I love I love I love I love I love <3

It 2012 this year, so the world might end? Well then you are a believer, go ahead and do amazing things.

In my point of view, end of the world or not, you should always do amazing things with your life. Keep it interesting (: Its very Good for the soul.

That’s it for me folks. If you happen to see me, do say Hi :)

Credits to Dania Edina

p.s: I forgot, from the previous post. This always happen. But I guess I’m the guy. I bet he doesn’t feel the same, oh well. HAHA. Pessimist.

Sparkles and Sparks <3

This is a tribute to the only person I know whom thinks “<3” means less than 3 (mathematically) . If you’re reading this and you are not sure what “<3” means, whomever you are, darling it is actually a heart shape okay? :)
Just in case you were wondering what a heart shape is..
William Butler Yeats once wrote “Hearts are not had as a gift but hearts are earned” . How do you earn a heart? You do not because its part of the free will and people do what they choose with their will. Unfortunately , this post is not directed to contradict Mr. Yeats. Maybe some other time ;) This post is for Sparkles.
This is how we met;

Karate. From here, you should be able to conclude that he has seen me at my very, very worst. That was 2 years ago.
We use to talk on Skype until 4am but no, it never worked out even though I had a huge crush on him. I gave up. Mainly because I knew he liked someone else. No matter, I will tell you why I fell.

Its his eyes.

They’re so SPARKLY :O

Other than that, its his “the-very-laid-back-but-still-focus-and-determined” personality . I don’t know. He just has this dominance over me whenever he interacts with me. It almost as though his masculinity can be felt thru every aspect of interaction he has with me.
Okay. I don’t exactly know what I’m rambling about. I mean masculinity whats’ with that ? –.-“
So , I really do not feel like doing the girly confession of the why I like him. Dude, Common sense. Great personality, sparkly eyes, mixed and if you read my previous post click here (First and second line of the second paragraph). He fits me :D , amuses me, accepts me, defines me, completes me , amazes me, knows me and the list goes on and perhaps never ends.
I’ll just tell you a lil’ bit about him (:
He’s currently doing his Foundation in Physical Science at University Malaya. Smart boy, he is :D He doesn’t go to class much because he likes to sleep but I really hope even though that is his case, he will still score. Need to keep them parents happy y’know? :P
He wears specs by the way –->

Sometimes when I’m hugging him, I feel like the world is at peace. Then I realise that its just his heartbeat. Its so calming .

Ignore the girl side of me. Its over – bearing sometimes . Forgive me for not have banished it long ago but I still have boobs you know. Okay I know. Lame.
In other news, He is a musician :D

The Guitar and Piano are just a few of the countless instruments that he is able to play . He’s talented. I hope he knows that for a talent not known is a talent lost.
oh, I forgot to tell you one very important detail. He’s half Persian . You can start laughing now. AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH . Okay stop. No, you’re wrong but you still may laugh. He is not a terrorist by the way , though
he can pull this look off –>
Hmm, What else shall I tell you , dear reader? You’re supposed to be bored to death by now.

oh look! Its the Flag of India :D Woopee!

My mother likes him . okay last picture of him. If you can’t recognise him after reading this then you’re just plain blur or simply uncaring towards this subject which then I would have to ask you why you are still reading this. lol.
Taken at my house on my laptop :D I know camera sucks.
I bet you’re reading this sparkles, and laughing your butt off –.- Laugh lah. You might never hear this from me so you might as well read it from me.

I did not tell you his name? Forget it. I’ll leave it up to your diligence in read the tags.






OKAY . UGH.
My specs. You jelly? Muahaha

Have great week reader(s)! :D I love you :)

So keep reading! AHAHAHA (Publicity stint)

-Hayani-

Politics in education. WHAT?! Oh you have to read this!

Darshenn, a KL school boy, compared his new mathematics and science marks to his old marks. He felt utterly betrayed and horrified. For a person who scored Straight A’s for UPSR, he had done very badly for his first test in high school because it was in Malay. “How could the government to this to me?!” He thought.

Rui ying, a student in a Chinese vernacular school who, as a norm, always scored straight A’s and never had any trouble during exams was struggling to answer her midterm science exams questions. She had not done well in the previous exam and had been scolded and caned.

Huda, is the daughter of a fisherman who is quite frankly speaking very annoyed by the change of language in her school syllabus and also annoyed at her very insular community. University syllabus is going to be in English. By right, math and science, especially secondary school, should be taught in English. She ignores her previous thought and starts learning History. Her thoughts are filled with Hitler and the Boston tea party then, she snaps back to reality. They are not a part of her history syllabus. She frets and tries to concentrate.

Hitam, a young teen living in the forest of Borneo who travels 3 miles a day on foot to get to school doesn’t understand why his mathematics changed to another language after he took all the trouble to learn the English language. He is about to give up.

Miranda, a Chindian mother who is worried about her children they do not know evens the slightest bit of general World History. She reminiscence her school days when they learnt about the hanging gardens of Babylon and fears her children will never know about these ancient wonders and history.

Education in the largest sense is any act or experience that has a formative effect on the mind, character, or physical ability of an individual. In its technical sense, education is the process by which society deliberately transmits its accumulated knowledge, skills, and values from one generation to another. As defined by Wikipedia.

Defined as a process by which groups of people make collective decisions or as a term that generally applies to the art or science of running governmental or state affairs by Wikipedia, Politics has a vast influence on the education in our beloved country. One can perceive that the word “politics” is, in fact, a very dirty word in Malaysia. Mention it and the look of disdain would be etched on most people’s faces. Mention it to your parents that you are interested to be a politician and I would guarantee that there would not be any family hugs and tears of happiness flowing.

What does politics has to do with education? Well, politics play the dominant influence in shaping the education policies of the country. Apparently when it comes to structural policy implementation, the interest of politicians comes first and interest of student comes last. Given the examples above, today I stress on the constant changing of mathematics and science in English to Malay and vice versa and the horrible history syllabus we have today.

Have you noticed, during every election, some politician will either promise to keep the education system in English or change it to Malay depending on the state? Well, I have. My feelings towards it are of despise and disgust. It shows that they make empty promises just to win the election and be done with it. They don’t care about us, about innocent students who have their minds and lives messed up with continual policy changes in education.

For havens sake, these politicians should make up their mind. Should they be willing to take the risk of losing some voters to make the education system better? In universities, Mathematics and science is taught in English. That’s why in 2002, Educationist at large breathed a sigh of relief when a glimmer of hope was seen in the introduction of English in the teaching of Mathematics and Science in English but that quickly disappeared when the policy was scrapped in 2009 and both critical subjects will be taught in Malay in 2012. What was alarming was that pressure from political extremist groups and language purists and NGO’s from both sides of the divide was successful in influencing the government in disbanding this policy. It is disheartening is that these groups seem to know more about language policies than educationists and reformists in the field. These insular people are actually the catalyst of the change.

On the other hand we have the History syllabus.

On the 15^th of May 2011 a group of scholars and non-governmental organisations (NGO) pushing for greater accuracy in history textbooks for secondary school students gathered for the first time.

-The Malaysian Insider-

The term ‘greater accuracy’ amuses me here. Does that mean that we have been learning History that is not accurate or more importantly true?! Here is another bad effect about politics in education. The government will try to brainwash us into thinking that they are such saints and that they have saved us from injustice. When they themselves were the cause of all the chaos in the first place. In our history syllabus there are terms referencing to instil patriotism. These terms should been in our textbooks if they had wanted us to learn factual and truthful history or are they afraid of letting us know the truth.

If we are to compare the History syllabus of our beloved country and other developed countries, we can see that the other countries actually teach the students there not only their countries history but also general world history. This means that the other nation students are better equipped with facing the world as a whole than us. Before our past education minister, whose name I will not mention to avoid any controversy, changed our History syllabus, we were just like the other nations. We learnt about Hitler, the hanging gardens of Babylon etc. but that was all in the past. During my 46 year old mothers time I’d say. Now the only History we’re learning is how miserable we were before Independence. In my point of view, we actually must thank the British for what we have today. People who dare to Speak out.

The influence of politics in our education system can be seen as pathetic or disgraceful! The education body of our country should be an entirely different body from politics so as it would not be used for the ease of winning elections. Think about the students. Think about the future. Education is no flimsy matter.

Written by

Hanida Hayani Ishan

Want but Cannot

I want to write about you so much.

But I really cannot find the words.

To describe how amazing you are,

have always been

and will always be.

I want to describe him. I want to tell myself how I have always felt about him. I can’t. You will know soon dear reader. You will :)

I will share this over-whelming happiness.

Best friends and boy friends

I have come to the point of my life where i could care less about what other people say about me. They knew me in the past and what I am now is different.

 

I have also realised that there is no such thing as a best friend. The reason to that is all of them no matter how nice or what you have been through together will and shall betray you. Whether by spreading vicious rumours about you, stealing your crush or just plain ignores you, they will hurt you.

 

To concour with that, I find that there is also no such thing as a guy best friend for a girl. To this the logic is simple. No matter how tomboy-ish you are or how hard you try, you will never understand him because, he is just not going to be open to you the way you would like him to be. Other than that, as a rule, boys prefer boys. They have a “bro-code”. No matter how long you have know him and no matter what you have been through. The “bros in the Bro-code” comes first. The girl is known as a hoe. Like the saying, bros before hoes. Also, one of you might fall for the other (worst case scenario).

You might be wondering or even frustrated of how I am treating my friends at this moment or with this blog post but the thing is, I feel so alone right now that I do not care. Why would I? They don’t care about me when I am unhappy. It is only the happiness that they want me to share.